In my last post, I went into great detail about my family’s happy meal, roast chicken with lemon-tarragon sauce. It was a great meal, and the evening went well…except for a 30-minute window of time during my dinner prep.

I had been quite time conscious, and I was trying to stay organized so that E would have plenty of time to do my makeup. The timing was working out well, and I only had about 15 more minutes of work before J took the reins to finish up dinner. I had just gone out to cut herbs from the garden, and there was a pretty strong storm moving in. With herbs in hand, I beat the rain with seconds to spare. This is where all of my best-laid plans fell apart.

J was sitting at the bar, keeping my company, while I quickly chopped parsley. Unfortunately, my left index finger got in the way, and I chopped right through the corner of my nail into the skin below.

Now, for most people, this would be alarming, but they would very quickly stop and simply clean the wound. I am not most people. I am a total wimp when it comes to flesh wounds, especially mine. I get light-headed, sweaty and nauseous. I knew this cut was bad and there would be blood. I’m not a vocally hysterical person,  but instead I get this steely, super quiet vibe when I’m panicking. So, very calmly I say, “J, I need you to get me wet wash cloth,” all the while never even looking at my finger wound but getting it under a cold water faucet. The only problem is most the wash cloths were currently in the washing machine, and my now frantic hubby is running around tying to find a suitable rag for my bleeding finger. Finally, we had a rag, and he simply needed to get my finger wrapped to avoid me seeing blood.

Remember the part, when I said there was a storm brewing? Yeah, the power went out, just as Jeff was finding a rag. As he’s scrounging around, E comes into the kitchen to see what all the comotion is about. I’m standing at the sink, staring at E in the dark, waiting on J to bring me a rag, and my peripheral vision is failing. I’m queasy and light-headed, afraid I’ll need stitches. Soon, J appears with a rag and wets it. I don’t remember the next few minutes, because apparently I passed out. J, trying to keep me from hitting the floor, asks E to wrap my finger as they drag me to a chair. Halfway there, I wake up for a brief moment, then pass out again. It’s literally a 13-step journey from the sink to the chair.

Throughout all of this, I could sense commotion and hear muddled voices. This is the first time in my life I’ve passed out, and it was strange to think it happened in just a few short moments. When I came to, I was sitting in the chair with my finger wrapped in a rag. Now, most well-stocked homes have a first-aid kit for emergencies that’s stocked with bandaging and wound ointment. Yeah, not us. My girls are 12 and 10, and they still manage to keep us cleaned out of all suitable bandages. Gauze was the right bandage for this wound, and we had one tiny piece of gauze that L was able to track down to cover my finger. Fortunately the bleeding has stopped, so a trip to the ER was avoided.

While all this is going on, dinner prep is in full-swing. I was in no shape to finish, and I was still a good 15-minutes shy of where I needed to be, so from the couch, I was trying to direct J with specific cooking instructions. Just as he was getting started, he happened to reach down to scratch his leg and found a black bump, a little black insect bump that had burrowed into his leg from the day before. He had to stop and run off to pull a tick out of his leg. Thank goodness L was standing there, and I was able to guide her through potato prep.

Finally, J came back, tick free, and was ready dive in. I was feeling up to getting ready, but there was little to no time for E to do my make-up. I put on a dress, and took out my ponytail, hoping my hair would have some dramatic volume. E did a 10-minute job on my face, and it was time for dinner.

Somehow, we managed to find our way to the dining room table, with hot food to eat, the power restored, my finger fully bandaged, and us girls looking like a million bucks. It was a hilarious miracle. Although it was a totally unexpected twist of events, we all managed to get a big laugh out of it.